Alex

 I guess I should continue my story of guys. Though I feel like no more stories come close to being as eventful as Philip's. 

Anyway after all that happened I slowed way down on my consumption of men. But I didn't stop cold turkey. 

One day I was checking my Facebook and I saw one of my recommended friend was a guy named Alex. I thought he looked alright in his pics so I requested his friendship. Well, he accepted and we started talking. I told him exactly what I wanted. He was only a couple stoplights down the main road in Englewood so we made a plan. 

I get to his house and he's sitting out front waiting for me. I greet him and we go inside. He seems pleasant enough. But, listen up, I get his pants off and he's like child sized. Like I felt a little disturbed. He wants me to go down, so I try my best. Not much to hold on to. Even when he's hard he's small. Yikes. Little surprised since Alex is pretty tall. Did I mention Alex had pretty ice blue eyes. Well he did. 

So we did our thing and I hang out for awhile. He's pert cool. 

We decided to meet again and I come on by not expecting that HIS MOM was home.  Foe real, what guy invites over a girl while his mom is home. Geez, but whatever  maybe she's cool.

I tried to meet him again and turns out he can't bring me to his house anymore. Really, dumbass? He didn't admit it but I'm sure he got in trouble. We tried to meet at the gas station to find another place to go. Somehow David had intercepted our messages and Alex told me to sort shit out with my husband he wasn't gonna be involved. I don't blame you Alex, I don't blame you at all.

Aftermath: I never saw or heard from Alex again.