I don't have any friends in New Hampshire. Well, actually one. My friend Heather that I work with. She's just the best. But we don't hang out or anything. We both have jobs and kids and lives, etc. But she also knows about my life and what I've been through and she still accepts me.
You spend time with different people depending on what your income level is. Don't even lie and tell me that isn't true. While I was a nurse I had other nurse friends or people with similar professional careers. That was fine then because that was me.
But after my arrest and my time in my drug program I was working in housekeeping and at restaurants. And during that time I found friends that worked in similar low wage fields. They knew my struggles and they were like me. Poor people hang with other poors. We struggled together. We were all on food stamps and shopped at the dollar store. Some had addiction issues like myself and some had multiple past arrests, some were felons. We all struggled paycheck to paycheck and we drove old broken down cars. We weren't trying to outdo or impress each other. We didn't hang out with people in higher income levels because those people either feel sorry for people like us or didn't want to be associated with people like that.
But the friends I made while I was at the bottom were the most genuine, kind and selfless people you would ever meet. They accepted me with my addictions and my legal troubles. They didn't look down on me. And I felt more comfortable with them. You see, poor people will give you a ride for free or give you their last couple bucks if you need it because we have all been there together. They know what it's like to have nothing and struggle every day. And I don't know the rates of drug and alcohol use based on income levels but there is quite a bit at the bottom. I won't lie. When you have nothing, you are desperate to feel okay for just a precious little while until the effects wear off. Many times they might suffer from untreated mental health issues because they can't afford good insurance, only Medicaid. And it isn't necessarily easy to find a Dr. who takes it. So you treat your own mental illness with the drugs and alcohol.
People who have money like to say " Money doesn't buy happiness.". But money allows you to live more comfortable and a little easier. I'd rather be miserable with money honestly. At least I know I won't have to live in a hotel room with my entire family.
I'm back to my career I'm educated for and, unlike most of the people I knew back then, I've improved my financial situation significantly. I've tripled my income and I'm comfortable now. Thankfully I had the foresight to get an education in my young years, that's the only thing that saved me. But many people can't just do that. They can't afford school or they don't have time because they have to work to live, or they have legal issues in their past that prevent being able to get in some fields. I consider myself lucky. But I'm no better than anyone. I know if many of my current coworkers knew about my past that they would judge me.
Growing up, my family taught me that the poor people were lazy and looking to live off the government. I assumed it must be true. But the first time I had to apply for food stamps I realized that was all lies taught to middle class and rich people so they would vote against social assistance programs for the lower class. It's possible to work two minimum wage jobs and still qualify for food stamps. That's not the fault of poor people. That's the fault of corporations thinking a certain portion of the population deserves to be poor for no reason, while big CEOs make multiple millions of dollars yearly.
Americans hate poor people for some reason. They don't want to help them or see them or want them to live healthy full lives. They want them to suffer for nothing. Many people are born into poverty and they can't escape. It's hard to move up when you grew up a certain way and you don't have the support or the money to improve your situation. So you just continue the life that your parents and your grandparents lived before you, working your fingers to the bone to barely scrape by. Don't even get me started on how abortion bans will continue to keep poor people poor without any hope of escape.
I won't forget who gave me kindness when I needed it most. I won't forget the people that I met and stood by me when I was at the bottom. I won't forget the friends I made in my darkest days. I won't forget when I have been. It's a part of me now. I lived that life and I made it through. But not everyone does.
