So I set up the hookup. I was nervous as hell but I promised myself I wasn't going to back out. After my mental health court meeting I headed out. I didn't tell anyone what I was going to do. I was going to drive to Lakeland and meet him at this hotel he was staying for his work. In my future meetups I started telling my mental health court friends in case something happened to me. I was between jobs at this time so he said he'd give me twenty bucks for gas since I was driving to him.
So the adrenalin was flowing but I wasn't as scared as I should have been. It didn't even enter my head that he might kill me or anything. I mean I was going to have sex with a guy I never met before so what could happen, right? So I got to the hotel. Now I was getting really nervous. I was thinking, should I leave? What if he didn't look like his picture? I drove past some of the rooms looking for the number I needed thinking he was probably watching me. I was feeling dumb for some reason. He was going to see me before I saw him. I found the room number. No body was there but a guy was sitting outside of the room next to it. Maybe he knew him. I went to knock on the door. The guy sitting outside the other room, says "Hey!" I turn around. He says the room was over there, he just wanted to see me first. Hmmm.
We walk inside and I'm trying to make the most awkward small talk about the drive up from Port Charlotte. I also realize I'm taller than him by a couple inches but he definitely looked as good as his pictures showed. He grabbed me by both sides of my waist and looked me up and down and said , "Well, look at you!" I didn't know how to respond so I said, "Are you drunk?" He lets go and says, "No!" I apologize and mumble about I haven't done this before, blah blah. I'm not sure of the exact details but somehow I ended up at the foot of the bed with him and he picked me up with my legs around him and he threw me on the bed. I started laughing. He crawled to me and he must have started kissing me. The details at this point become foggy. But sex happened. In all kinds of ways. And I remember thinking that, "Holy shit, I'm cheating on my husband." But this thought didn't make me feel guilty nor did it make me want to stop. Because I wasn't in love with this guy.
I remember hoping that it wasn't going to leave marks when he slapped my ass. But I enjoyed it so much. He talked so dirty to me and it was perfect. Sexy but not degrading. I did things with him that I had no idea that my body wanted to do. And I felt so free because I wasn't going to see him again so I didn't have to feel self conscious or embarrassed of the way I looked naked. He said I looked great. And I guess if I look great naked to a 25 year old guy that's quite the compliment. I think we went at it for an hour. God, until we were sore and sweaty and sticky.
Then we laid there talking about shit. I talked about quitting drugs and the hypersexuality that I seemed to have developed afterward. He talked a little about himself. He was super cool. God, the sex was so good. Then I got my gas money and off I went smiling all the way home.
Aftermath: David found out about Chaz eventually and I got in huge trouble. I don't know if David found out right after Chaz or after I had hooked up with a few more. But I experienced so many fights because of my hookups as to be expected. David deleted all Chaz's info. Even so, Chaz found me other ways and tried to hook up with me again in the following year but David cockblocked that unfortunately. I'm still in contact with Chaz but I only send him pictures now but we still talk about that day. I guess it was memorable for both of us.
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