Thursday, March 06, 2008

Zoloft-my love and hate relationship

I have been on this stuff since just before Sean was born, I've even had my dosage increased to 100mg every day( which I do believe is a little higher than average doseage, I think average Zoloft users are on 50mg.)
And to think the world thought I was just a naturally happy gal...
Anyway, I love the stuff. I am better at dealing with stress and normal life situations without crying, yelling, or having anxiety attacks. Yes, I am one that is prone to anxiety, I bet that is such a surprise (ha ha, note the sarcasm). I wasn't taking it for depression as much as general anxiety disorder, something I have been suffering with for much of my life. But I have been njoying the antidepressant effects anyway. I feel so happy and content about life( see previous blog entry)
I was running low on my medication earlier in the week and decided to take it every other day to make it last longer, simply because I was putting off reordering it.
The point of my blog entry is simply a reminder to myself and others, that was truly a very poor decision.
I am suffering from withdrawal now because the medication level in my blood has dropped causing me to feel extraordinarily crappy. I have night sweats, strange dreams, irritability and anxiety, fatigue, and an overwhelming feeling that I just can't wake up all the way. My brain is sluggish.
Oh, do I feel miserable.

Oddly enough in my strange dreams last night I noticed that showing and washing my hair were extremely prevalent. I couldn't even estimate how many times I did that during the night. So obviously, as soon as I got up I had to... shower and wash my hair. Maybe my dream was telling me I am unclean...or just a little crazy.

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